סימן קצו סעיף א
מִי שֶׁמֵּת לוֹ מֵת שֶׁהוּא חַיָב לְהִתְאַבֵּל עָלָיו, הֲרֵי זֶה אוֹנֵן עַד לְאַחַר הַקְּבוּרָה. לֹא יִנְהַג קַלּוּת רֹאשׁ, כְּדֵי שֶׁלֹּא יֹאמְרוּ עַל הַמֵּת, שֶׁהָיָה אָדָם קַל וְלָכֵן אֵין זֶה טָרוּד בִּקְבוּרָתוֹ וּבְאֶבְלוֹ וְאֵינוֹ חוֹשֵׁשׁ בְמִיתָתוֹ. וְזֶהוּ גְּנַאי גָּדוֹל לַמֵּת, וְהוּא בִּכְלַל לוֹעֵג לָרָשׁ, אֶלָּא יִתְרָאֶה לַכֹּל, שֶׁהוּא טָרוּד וְנִבְהָל עַל מִיתָתוֹ וּקְבוּרָתוֹ. לֹא יֹאכַל בַּחֶדֶר שֶׁהַמֵּת בּוֹ, אֶלָּא בְּחֶדֶר אַחֵר. וְאִם אֵין לוֹ חֶדֶר אַחֵר, יֹאכַל בְּבֵית חֲבֵרוֹ. וְאִם אֵין לוֹ בֵּית חָבֵר, יַעֲשֶׂה בִּפְנֵי הַמֵּת מְחִצָּה גְבֹהָה עֲשָׂרָה טְפָחִים, וְלֹא יְהֵא רֶוַח פָּתוּחַ תַּחְתֶּיהָ שְׁלֹשָׁה טְפָחִים, וּתְהֵא רְאוּיָה לַעֲמֹד בִּפְנֵי הָרוּחַ. וְאִם אֵין לוֹ דָבָר לַעֲשׂוֹת בּוֹ מְחִצָה, מַחֲזִיר פָּנָיו וְאוֹכֵל. בֵּין כָךְ וּבֵין כָּךְ, וַאֲפִלּוּ הוּא בְעִיר אַחֶרֶת, אֵינוֹ מֵסֵב וְאוֹכֵל דֶּרֶךְ קְבִיעוּת, אֶלָּא דֶרֶךְ אַרְעַי, וְאֵינוֹ אוֹכֵל בָּשָׂר וְאֵינוֹ שׁוֹתֶה יָיִן.
When a person suffers the loss [death] of a relative for whom he is obligated to observe the ritual mourning,1See below, Chapter 203. he is considered an onein until after the burial.2However if the deceased is being taken for burial to a distant place which will delay his burial for several days, the mourner is not considered an onein until they arrive at the city of burial. (See Shulchan Aruch 71:1, Biyur Halacha.) An onein must avoid [all kinds of] levity, lest his conduct lead people to say that the deceased was a worthless person, and therefore he is not bothered about his burial, and his mourning, and is not concerned about his death. This is a tremendous disgrace to the deceased, and such a person is included among those "Who ridicule the poor." Rather he should manifest to all that he is distressed and concerned about the deceased and his burial. He should not eat in the room where the deceased lies, but in another room. If there is no other room, he should eat in his neighbor's house. If he has no neighbor, he should put up a partition in front of the deceased, that is at least ten tefachem high,3See Glossary. and the open space below [the partition] should be less than three tefachim. It should be strong enough to resist the wind. If he has no material with which to make a partition, he should turn his face aside and eat. Under all circumstances, and even if he happens to be in another city, he should not have an elaborate meal, but only a simple snack, and he must not eat meat or drink wine.
תנא דבי אליהו כל השונה הלכות בכל יום מובטח לו שהוא בן העולם הבא שנאמר הליכות עולם לו אל תקרי הליכות אלא הלכות (נדה ע"ג.)